For this round, I presented 5 questions to Donna Keyes who is a minister at Glad Tiding Tabernacle in New York City. Donna and her husband Carl are co-pastors. I was a member there for a number of years when I lived in Manhattan, and was also co-leader of their singles' ministry. I was blessed by Donna's wisdom during that time, so it's no surprise that her answers below provide amazing insight.

1) What are the top 3 signs that you are ready to marry the person you are dating?
Trust, trust & trust.

-You trust the person enough to consider building a future together (buying a home, sharing a bank account, connecting your life's goals with this person, possibly raising children together)

-You trust the person enough to consider a life of mutual submission. Where you are no longer just living only out of your own needs, but where his needs are considered equally as your own. There is a verse in Romans 12:10 that says "...in honor giving preference to one another" It takes trust in the other's character to raise their needs above your own. This cannot be mandated, it must come naturally, out of a woman's soul that feels safe. It takes knowing that he is doing the same thing back for you. So, no one's needs get set aside.

-You trust him to the point where you can't imagine going on the journey of life, in all of its joy, uncertainty, successes and failures...without him. You want to share life with him.

2 There are so many people unemployed now. But should I begin a relationship with a guy who doesn't have a job?
The fact that a person is in a rough patch is not a hindrance to beginning a relationship. In fact, it is the perfect place of observation. What you see at a time like this, will give you a glimpse into the character of the man. It also gives you a strong sense of his personality, the real one. Does he stay focused and disciplined, is he flexible and open. Realistic yet hopeful. What do you see in him at this point? If it is denial, excuses, hopelessness, a sense of entitlement----not your guy! Look for patterns. Pressure squeezes so that what's inside comes out. You can now see what that is. Can you trust what you see?

3) I receive a lot of comments from Christians who think my "finding him" is against God's will because of Proverbs 18:22 "He who finds a wife…" What are your thoughts on women being proactive concerning finding love?
One of the biggest obstacles to interpreting the Bible is imposing our linear western mindset on the way the Hebrew thinking writers wrote. Think verbs, not nouns. Think culture, not gender. Think principle, not formula. Think journey, not event. If you start there, you have a bit of a glimpse into understanding.

"He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord". This is the principle of receiving good things from God, which come from His grace, His favor. Good things from God represent His mercy. That's what the point of this verse is. Women did not look for men as husbands then, because their families did that for them, along with providing a dowry. Let's look around, we don't do that today. The message is not to live out of the culture that the Bible was written to, the message is the principle. Good gifts come from God. "He who is joined with a virtuous woman in marriage is blessed by the Lord" [Pr 19:14] is the same concept. You wouldn't interpret that as only men are blessed by God in a marriage.

Certainly Ruth and Naomi, not only went after Boaz as the husband for Ruth, they planned, were assertive and unashamed. Doing things in that cultural time that were quite bold and aggressive. When Ruth and Boaz were married, all of them were blessed by the Lord, Naomi, Ruth and Boaz. Ruth "found" a good husband and Boaz "found" a good wife. Their son, Obed was in the genealogy of Jesus.

4) Should women consider marrying someone they appreciate, admire and love, but aren't "in love" with?
There is no definitive answer to this. This question has got to be answered out of the peace that one feels in their own heart. I just read an excerpt from a book written about Rick Warren that talks about him and his wife Kay getting married because they felt God told them to. There was no love and passion in the beginning of their marriage. Time, patience and counseling worked that through for them.

But that is a challenge that one has to know comes from the hand of God. Spending the rest of your life with someone that feels like a trusted brother, opens up a lot of challenges with intimacy. As one who has counseled people in marriage crisis for the past 20 years, this is one of the hardest areas for women to walk through. Not "feeling connected" to their husbands. Feeling "heat", feeling the flutter of the heart when you receive the phone call or the e-mail, although not the most important thing, is a thing.

5) With most marriages ending in divorce, why should we bother pursuing life-long commitments?
In our DNA is the longing for intimacy. We were designed with the desire. The reason for that is that we are made in the image of God, we are called image bearers. God is 3. In Himself there is intimate connection between the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. We have that same longing for connection, although not everyone wants to be married. Many will choose to pursue other goals and worthwhile endeavors and many will long for a partner to share their lives with. Despite the statistics, we choose hope. Augustine said "Hope is a waking dream." It is that dream of a lifelong intimacy that gives us hope that maybe, just maybe, we can have the dream. Keep hope alive.